Wisdom on parenting comes from Adam Grant, an American psychologist, author, and father of 3.
WISDOM TO RAISE A MORAL CHILD
Be concerned about your child becoming kind, compassionate and helpful. The value that matters is caring. Praise the character to help children internalize it as part of their identities. Say: “You’re a good person, even if you did a bad thing, and I know you can do better.” Remember that action also shapes character.
WANT YOUR CHILD TO BE CREATIVE?
Limit your many rules to a few values and encourage your child to think for themselves and to find “joy in work” through nurturing their curiosity.
STOP ASKING KIDS WHAT THEY WANT TO BE WHEN THEY GROW UP
It forces them to define themselves in terms of work. Instead, invite them to think about what kind of person they want to be – and about all the different things they might want to do.
EXPAND AWARENESS OF THE ROLE MODELS BEYOND YOURSELF
It helps children see the things that haven’t been seen before. Nurture their impulse to be original, and help them find their own role models in various ways – literature, fiction, living or past.
ARGUE IN FRONT OF YOUR KIDS RESPECTFULLY
Teach kids to argue and learn the value of open and thoughtful disagreement. Witnessing arguments – and participating in them – helps us grow a thicker skin. Argue as if you’re right AND listen as if you’re wrong.
RAISE YOUR CHILD TO BE RESILIENT
Kids’ brains are able to adapt quickly to new and stressful situations. Mattering: knowing that others notice you, care about you, and rely on you. It’s the answer to the question, do I have significance in the world? To build resilience, we can stop shielding kids from ordinary setbacks and start giving them the freedom to play, explore, and resolve conflicts on their own. “Prepare your child for the path, not the path for your child.”
Related Articles and Videos on Parenting Wisdom from Adam Grant:
- Stop Asking Kids What They Want to Be When They Grow Up The New York Times, April 2019
- What Straight-A Students Get Wrong The New York Times, December 2018
- Can Your Job Make You a More Controlling Parent? Salon, July 2018
- How to Raise a Creative Child The New York Times, January 2016
- Raising a Moral Child The New York Times, April 2014